New vid

'Nough said.

Little Piece O' Convo

Sixty X Celph says:
Need me some o' that Kool-Aid pie... the cat just ran off with my fork...

Mr. Grape says:
LMFAO!

Mr. Grape says:
Now that's a quote!

Mr. Grape says:
That should be your next Blogspot entry, haha!

Sixty X Celph says:
Hah!

Mr. Grape says:
So did you get your fork back?

Sixty X Celph says:
I did, by the gods.

Sixty X Celph says:
She picked it up, took it, set it down, and began to play with it, haha

Mr. Grape says:
Wow, my kitty never did anything close to that, lol.

Sixty X Celph says:
Haha

Sixty X Celph says:
She's such a silly fatty

Mr. Grape says:
She should have went for the pie instead!

Sorry, y'all.

I haven't typed up a weblog nor have I uploaded a new vid to YouTube in awhile. Sorry, y'all.

I just haven't been doing anything much lately, so, nothing to talk about. Been lazin' about watchin' movies and playin' vidgames. Been kind of down and boring. Which wasn't helped by my decision to watch Boys Don't Cry, which is a terribly tragic film and just made me even more depressed. And angry, because I hate people.

In good news, fourth season of Weeds started on Monday, so that was pretty nifty. I think it's off to a good start, getting to interesting places possibly. Good just as easily get irritatingly stupid and pointless, though, so we'll see how that goes.

I realize I should be working on, well, anything, and the gods know I've a backlog of stuff to get to, but... blah. Soon, hopefully. It'd also be nice to get on with my life, or get my life started really depending on how you look at it, but, life's overrated. I hope.

Anyway, so, yeah, hopefully I'll do something soon. I want to, but at the same time, I don't want to do anything, know what I mean?

Better.

Is it weird that I accept that all of my friends are better than me? This is a realization I came upon a few minutes ago. All of my friends are more successful than me. I am a tag-a-long. A coattail-rider, if you will.

Let me detail some of my friends for you and show you what I mean.

One makes music, great music. Probably the best programmer I've ever heard, definitely the best one I know. She also draws a comic. And does a good job from what I've seen, especially for someone who doesn't really do much visual art.

One is yet another musician, and damn good. A variety of musical projects, numerous songs for each. He's also run a fairly popular podcast.

One makes vids. He likes to say that I'm an equal part of it, but, he's gotta be trying to make me feel better. Or he's fooling himself. Either way, he does most everything, and I help out as much as I am capable. Good way to explain it, he could easily continue without me. There wouldn't be anything if it were just me.

There are dozens of examples, but, I imagine that gets my point across. All of my friends are better than me. But, this doesn't bother me. I'm not brought down by this; I am, in fact, quite happy simply to know them and be their friend. To be a part of their lives.

A coattail-rider.

But, then, what does that say about me?

Neuroses Part One of Infinity

It's currently 2:40 a.m. and I can't sleep because I can't stop thinking.

For many years, I've stood by a very simple idea; although I do not want to die, I am not afraid to die. Sounds all falsely noble and pretentious, but it used to be "I'm not afraid to die", but people interpreted that as being suicidal. So, it had to be amended. With that being said, though, I've been thinking about my own mortality [again], and it's time to change it again.

While I do not want to die, I am not afraid of death, but, I am afraid of dying.

Allow me to explain.

I do not want to die. Simple enough. I feel old, but in truth I am very young and have yet to experience many things in life. I am not prepared to die.

I am not afraid of death. Death itself doesn't worry me, doesn't upset me, and does not frighten me. This comes down to my "spiritual" beliefs, or general lack thereof. I do not believe that there is anything after death. I liken it, in my mind, to never waking up from sleep. I don't realize I'm sleeping while I'm asleep, it's only once I've awoke that this realization occurs to me. I will never realize my own death because there is not waking up from death. But, with that in mind...

I am afraid of dying. It can not be predicted, in truth can not be entirely prepared for. I could go to sleep after posting this and never wake up, and I would never know the difference. Add to this the statistics of accidents, statistical death tolls, and how unrealistic it is for me to consider I am not a part of that, that I've no potential to be a part of those statistics. The rational side of me knows that it's a relatively small chance, given the number of people whom die versus the number of people whom survive, but still... there is that small chance. And thus, I fear dying.

While I'm not sure when it started, exactly, somewhere around the age of at least 13, but no older than 15, I have heavily considered, and generally accepted, the fact that I may not live to see my next birthday. And I long believed that I would probably not reach the age of 20. I'm probably jinxing myself, as I haven't actually made it to 20, but it's looking to more and more likely as the weeks drag on.

Just to throw something at the end of this, my fear of dying ties into my dislike of sleeping, my arachnophobia, and the reason I am not comfortable with the idea of living alone. But I think I've typed enough, as it's now 2:56.

PSP!

Got my PSP today!

The funny story I mention and never go into is that if I had waited instead of pre-ordering it, I could have got a free guide for the game with it from Best Buy. (>_<)

Oh, well.

It also doesn't come with a memory stick, which is bullshit. Correct me if I'm wrong, but don't the normal PSP's come with memory sticks? Crappy ones, if I recall, but a memory stick nonetheless? Bullshit. Ah, well, looks like I'll be beating God of War: Chains of Olympus without actually saving the game. (>_<)

(^_^)

Haircut! Even made a vid on YouTube about it.

I like it, I like it a lot. (^____^)

Inflammable

Got Indestructible today, and it's a fantastic reminder of why I enjoy Disturbed as much as I do. (^____^)

I'm a Ramblin' Man

So, yep. The Playstation 2's parental settings for DVD's makes no fucking sense and is ultimately useless except as a nuisance.

I'm thinking about starting to shave my legs as well, anybody got any thoughts?

I have a growing list of DVD's that I need to purchase, but I'm in need of a job first... add to that the games list, and I may need two.

Why are there so many jackasses who play vidgames online? Seriously.

Oh, speaking of vidgames and going back to things that make no sense and are useless, the Xbox 360's ability to avoid or prefer a player you've played with makes no sense and is useless.

In happier news, my pre-order of Indestructible, the new album from Disturbed, shipped a day or two ago, and I'm hoping it's soon. There was an issue where they added this $16 tax to my PSP pre-order, which would have been nice to know beforehand, but whatever. So, I put more money into my bank account, and hopefully that'll be the end of that and it'll ship soon.

I can't think of anything else to add right now. Oh! Here's a good way to end:

Mr. Grape, there's a new vid on YouTube.

(o.o)

So, I'm about to fall asleep minutes ago, when out of the corner of my eye in the darkness there's a bright yellow flash and I hear a loud pop that sounded unmistakably like an electrical spark...

In case it turns out to be some weird kind of premonition and I die in a bizarre electrical fire in my sleep tonight, it was nice knowing you all. (o.o)

Random Info

When I'm talking on the phone, I can not stand still. I wander aimlessly or I pace.

Just sharin'. Anyone else similarly inflicted?

So...

Today's been interesting. Nothing like fixing a light fixture stark naked and dripping wet. *sigh*

Good news, I now have my learner's permit. Maybe I'll start growing up...

Naaaaaaah!

EDIT: I forgot to mention, I broke half of my spacebar, so, typing's a whole new experience. Bit slower, but I'm getting used to it.

I Feel...

Old. Among other things. How fucked up is that? This also brings up a metaphysical question; Am I old enough to feel old? Surely I haven't experienced enough in my life to be considered old by any means. But, alas, I feel out of touch. As odd as it sounds, I don't understand kids these days. Then again, I don't understand kids of my own age-bracket. Well... it's complicated. I understand them, but I don't get it, y'know what I mean?

Though, I don't feel there is anything age-restricted, but that belief only pertains to psychological matters. On a physiological level, I'm certainly far too young to feel old... right? But I do, I feel as though my body has aged more than it should. I have problems with my knees, my back's starting to ache more and more... I feel as though I'm deteriorating faster than I should be.

Well, that's enough pretentious bullshit for now.

Why?

Why would you make two versions of a DVD with completely different special features? What the fuck? I'm now glad I have both versions of Saw II, since they have COMPLETELY DIFFERENT FUCKING FEATURES. Yes, the special edition has more features, but it's lacking all the vids from the normal edition.

Why?

WHY?!

... there's no good fucking reason why!

Fuck you, Lions Gate, you cockgobblers.

Typing Takes Forever

Took way too long to do it, but the CD list is finally up. [*]'s denote a burned CD, unfortunately. And I didn't even include the CD's I've ripped or *gasp* downloaded but never burned.

As you can see, I've a long way to go before I've replaced them all with legitimate copies, but I'm workin' on it.

Whew. (>_<)

Thanks to a suggestion from the lovely Fran (chroniclesofbayley), there is now a complete list of all the Sega Genesis, Nintendo, Xbox, and Playstation games I own, as well as a list of the DVD's I own.

They're at the bottom of the right column, and some of them are very long. But if you're ever wondering if I own a DVD or game, there ya have it.

Squee!!!

One of the DVD purchases I made has arrived! And the other should be here by the end of the week at the latest. (^____^)

Initial Thoughts on Mario Kart Wii

I'm just gonna discuss the gameplay here and now. If I can ever get some of my backlog of vids done and do a full review for Mario Kart Wii, I'll discuss other aspects.

First thought? Frustrating.

Where the fuck did those blue shells of death come from? Now, I haven't played a Mario Kart game since the SNES, so it's not surprising that I may have missed some new items along the way, but, seriously... what the fuck is that all about?

I'm also not impressed by the bikes. They look and play fine enough, but for anything more serious that some quick races with friends the karts are the way to go.

Now, that's just initial thoughts. On further examination, the game's not bad in small doses. Much like Super Smash Bros. Brawl, there's an immense number of ways to play the game which I am all for, personally. Sometimes a game's just better with a standard controller. With that said, the Wii Wheel is fun for short and simple games with a friend. It's nifty, it's new, it's gimmicky. And it works fairly well. Gamecube controller is better for playing the more difficult circuits, though.

And, Mr. Grape, it's true, there is a barrage of items thrown around. More than once I would find myself smashed by a red shell, followed by a bob-omb explosion or one of those POW items, then finally one of those accursed blue shells. That puts me far behind. And it's really fucking annoying.

I'll reiterate that it's fun in short doses, though. But, I think I'll be getting more play out of my copy of Resident Evil 4 I finally bought while I was there to pick up Mario Kart Wii. At least, once I've unlocked all the karts and characters.

Wiiiiiii

Mario Kart Wii, sorry if you don't see me all day.

Totally let you know what I think of it tomorrow. Unless it sucks, then you'll hear about it later today.

OCD Neat Freak... Usually.

I like my things organized. All my movies, games, and CDs are in alphabetical order. It used to be that I was as organized in my creative ideas. I had a stack of notebooks. One was for lyrics and poetry, one was for dreams, one for bass riffs, etc., etc. Anymore, I just scribble my idea down onto anything handy due to many difficulties in this system: it was too annoying trying to locate the appropriate book from where I had it last, impractical to carry numerous notebooks when I'm on the go, if I had an idea at work I didn't generally have the time to find a notebook I may have brought with me... there were many issues.

Anyway, the whole point to this entry is that I have misplaced the red notebook which had at the end of it the very basic [and barely legible] script idea for "Your Dark Princess". (>_<) This isn't so much a problem of not having the script. Most of it is already contained within a notepad file here on this computer, and I'm fairly confident either I or Tebo could remember any specifics not already typed up. The problem is I have no idea what else was in that notebook [my memory is ostensibly the entire reason I write down any ideas I have as soon as I can].

If you happen to know the whereabouts of my red notebook, please let me know.

UPDATE: Found it! It was tucked into the stupid GED prep book I got.